There's a Mad TV Sketch between a therapist and a patient that I have watched in numerous psychology classes to teach us students how not to be a therapist. Every issue that the patient tells the therapist about, he gives her the answer of "Stop it" in return. This of course baffles, frustrates and confuses the patient and you can't really blame her. When we have issues and we seek out the advice of others it usually means two things 1. We just want someone to listen or 2. We want answers, a step by step guideline in what we're doing wrong and how to fix it.
So here is my really wisdom filled advice when it comes to comparing ourselves: STOP IT.
Seriously, just stop it. Is it helping you? Does it make you feel good? Do you feel like you fall asleep peacefully at night thinking about all the things you aren’t and someone else is?
Why do we do that? Why do we sit and knit pick at who we were created to be until we stop being able to see our worth clearly?
Why do we compare our story next to someone else's as if we were told they were supposed to be the same?
Why do we assume that there are thousands and thousands of people in this world so we can all think, look, and act like one another?
This journey of finding and loving ourselves does not come easy, it takes every day to be able to swallow enough courage to truthfully look for the beauty in ourselves instead of being overwhelmed with the little quirks. But comparison has a really sneaky way of keeping us further away from being able to do that because we allow it the power to do so.
The whole idea of “comparison is the thief of joy” is a REAL thing. It’s real and its ugly and it robs us from being able to hold these temples close and call them home. It steals away the joy we have and the reminder that we were each and individually FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY made. I think we forget what that means sometimes, it means that we were handcrafted, individually orchestrated from the amount of moles and freckles to your one dimple and the way your hair changes colors in the sun. It means that you were sketched out like a masterpiece with diligence, purpose and INTENTION. It means that who you are is who you are and you were not created to be someone else.
It means that he molded your very being in his hands, breathed a specific life inside of you and called it GOOD. Real good.
So Stop it. Stop thinking of who you have to be because of what someone else is.
Stop thinking that who you are is anything less or short of wonderful.
Stop it. Put down the list of what or who you aren’t and stop looking all the beautiful and glorious things you are.
And I get it, I’m not saying this from any high horse because I am right there with you swiping through my Instagram looking at abs I don’t have and hands I’m not holding and things I’m not doing. But I am tired of down scaling myself and my story because there is a radiance in them both that sparkles a little differently than anyone else and the same goes for you.
So stop it okay?
Easier said than done, I know but I’ll be on this journey of being a little more cautious with you.
Because here’s the thing…We don't get to ask God why.
We don't get to ask him for the blueprints to the person he's made us to try and make sense of it. We get to walk so boldly in this body that we get to ask, why the heck not.
If you want a good laugh you can find the sketch here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYLMTvxOaeE