I am quick to give other people passess. Passes for grace and redemption that for some reason I have the hardest time extending to myself. When I make any type of mistake I hold myself to a standard higher than I would hold anyone else, unrealistic, strict, clenched fists type of standard. You don’t get to make mistakes and you don’t get to give yourself any mercy if you do. Be perfect, stand up straight, don’t say that, don’t do that, hold back tears, don’t admit when you’re not doing okay. I’ve always been somewhat tense, always on edge and always getting anxious over the smallest of things and I couldn’t really tell you why that is. I have parents who love me well and taught my siblings and I to love God, love others and everything else will come as it should after that. I’ve always had friends who loved me well and yet there’s always been these nagging thoughts in the back of my head that I didn’t deserve that type of love, that I wasn’t enough and wouldn’t be enough. The older I got (more so in college) I would experience so much stress anxiety and the weight of the pressure that I put on myself. I had to learn to unclench my fists a little bit, I had to stop being afraid of failure and living afraid. Afraid of not taking risks because of what others would think --- we can’t live that way, we weren’t meant to live that way.
inhale it like air because even though we don’t deserve that, we are still given it every day.
God extends grace to us every single day, so why do we limit what he’s already given us?
I heard a speaker a few months ago and my church's women's ministry event and she talked about how we should go about navigating through feelings of shame and guilt and how to grasp feelings of “enoughness.” She mentioned that daily she had to give herself permission, permission to not compare her life with the life of others or her enoughness with the enoughness of someone else. Isn’t that a wonderfully concept? Instead of constantly pointing out all the ways we feel as though we don’t measure up restraining everyday gifts of grace given to us because of it.
Maybe grace for you just means allotting yourself permission. Permission to not be okay when you’re truly not okay, permission to be vulnerable, permission to say no, permission to make time for your health (body and soul).
So right now, I want you to give you the space to do that for yourself or at least help you ease into this concept of what grace could mean for you.
Where do you need to let grace seep into your life?
I give myself permission to:
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