Day Eight || BREATHE || 30days30minutes

Coming home always puts life into a perspective that doesn't seem so overwhelming, tornado like and less sucky. Coming home always reminds me that I'm doing better than I think I am, I'm not drowning, I'm above water and breathing just fine.

For a moment there, when life seemed to jump out of my controlling hands and start doing whatever it is that it wanted to, I freaked out, I said yes to a bunch of things just to keep life going. I woke up, left my house and filled my day to the brim with stuff, people, places and things. For a few weeks, I navigated everything that I did through complete and utter fear- fear of not being able to pay my first car note or rent, fear of not being able to financially provide for myself, fear of simply holding still. Fear of looking back at all the decisions I've made the past couple of months and them being horrible mistakes.

For awhile there, I had to let the dramatics flow out of me for a moment.

You know the whole woe is me, I'm falling a part, life isn't going how I want it. Wah wah wah. Drama. I had to have a moment where I reminded myself that stress, worry and fear are not going to do anything but keep you exactly where you are. I had to tell myself

girl, okay yes, that sucked, it wasn't ideal-I get it. Those are not invalid realities but don't stop doing what it is you love, don't stop doing what gives you life just because life gave you a little kick in the butt.

This is not your down fall, this is your wakeup call.

Currently, my life group ( a group of women I meet with once a week and talk about life and the goodness of God, amongst other things) is reading Brene Browns book "Rising Strong." And oh my gosh, IT IS SO SO GOOD. I'm barely past chapter one and have already taken so many notes in the margin AND  had a really good conversation with this man on the metro about it--yeah it's one of those, THIS IS SO GOOD I HAVE TO TALK TO STRANGERS ABOUT IT type book #gold.  Anyway, this book is all about getting back up when life kicks you in the back of your knees and runs away like a giggling little brat. This book is not about how to dodge the bullets of life, it's not about the theoretical situation of if you will fall. It's all about the inevitable when. 

Yes, The falling is inevitable.

You will experience the deepest pit of "down" that life can throw you in.

You will be living in the middle of a tornado and people will question why you're not so effortlessly standing.

The victory however, the triumph and the slow clap moment, is when you get back up.

That part is unfortunately not inevitable, that is an active choice you have to make every time you are down.

So What's keeping you from getting back up?

Fear? Insecurity? Other people? Doubt?

Put those things in their rightful place, behind you. 

Everyone's weight is carried differently, everyone has problems and issues that for them seem monumental. Do not ever belittle that, do not ever thing that your struggle is any less or any more than anyone else's. Please don't invalidate your or anyone else's struggle either but also don't get so caught up in your own that you can't even see anyone else's.

Life is going to suck sometimes and then life is going to be equally beautiful, You're going to get both. That's what comes in the little goody bag of life, the candy no one really likes and also the really neat surprises you didn't even notice the first time around and the the old favorites that make really excited and nostalgic.

Life, is not as bad as it seems. I know it may seem like an earthquake came and split your entire reality apart but you're still breathing, you're still alive and this is going to pass. I know that's cliche and said  so many times but it's true. Because you're in a season right now that's supposed to entail exactly what you're experiencing and then you'll be in a new season and it'll be a whole new bag of goodies and not so goodies.

Fall is approaching (kind of) and so the other day my friend posted this quote on her instagram,

"The trees are about to show us how lovely it is to let the dead things go."

Oh my I think that is so breathtaking. We have to be able to let things die in order to know what life looks like. We have to be willing to unclench the fists, exhale a little deeper in order to move forward. We have to be willing to cry it out, yell it out, sometimes mumble language that Jesus will forgive us for, in order for us to realize the importance of getting back up. 

I stumbled across this little gem on pinterest today while searching for inspiration for this post and I think it's absolutely perfect, so I will leave you with this.

lifeisgood

Yes, the falling is inevitable, but I really hope you make the active choice to get back up.

UncategorizedArielle Estoria